To start, teaching in general is more than just giving information to a bunch of children day after day. We become invested in these student's lives. Laugh about them, cry about them, pray about them, think of them constantly! My students come home with me everyday, are there when I eat dinner, and greet me first thing in the morning (figuratively). I have much love and care for this group of 50 some kids. Even though the year isn't even halfway done, I find myself very invested in their welfare and their future.
That's where I get to this little thought that I had today during my run. The song "Fix My Eyes" by For King and Country was playing. Some of the lyrics to the song really stuck out in my head more than usual.
"Love like I'm not scared,
Give when its not fair,
Live life for another,
Take time for a brother,
Fight for the weak ones,
Speak out for freedom,
Find faith in the battle,
Stand tall but above it all,
Fix my eyes on you."
Right now in the classroom, I have been struggling. I want the world for these kids, and I want them to want them to reach for it. However, I am having trouble with some kids having the desire to learn and do well for themselves. I have a room of bright kids and they could all accomplish so much that I get so frustrated! And then I look at myself, how I am trying to keep up with the new subject material, study, and efficiently instruct the children while maintaining sanity, healthy diet, and a good relationship with friends and my boyfriend. So where's the space. How can I show love in everything I do-like the song says...when I don't have time for it all???? How??
In the spring of last year, while being a fourth grade teacher, I found myself almost breaking up with my boyfriend about this particular issue. In my head, I felt that all the love that I had been giving to my students was not being split into sections that my boyfriend had now occupied some of. I had a certain that my students needed to occupy all of the love I had available in Suriname, and that I was here for that task and that task only. I needed to take my love for my boyfriend and put it all into my class and classroom.
But that is wrong. Because I forgot that love is limitless.
Humans aren't given a fixed supply of love. Because God is love. And God is omnipotent and Omnipresent and doesn't have any restrictions. Love is the same. It is limitless. We can't comprehend it, can't measure it, can't compartmentalize it. It just is.
My mom once told me she thought she knew what love was. And then she had children. She held my big brother in her arms and was given more love than she had ever experienced before.
As a teacher, I have a lot of children. In fact, every year I will get new children. New children to love, to nurture, and hopefully teach them a few things. It isn't the same as your own personal children, however I am sure that many teachers out there can say that there are some similarities, and as a single unmarried woman, I can tell you that some days that feel like my children.
Anyways, it is a comfort to know that every year, I will have a non dwindling supply of love that will be poured into me from the Lord. This love will carry me through the school year. It will help me fight for the weak students, and speak out for those that need help. It will keep me strong when I am feeling defeated and weak. It will help me stand taller when things are not going my way, and will help me when I need to put myself second and help another.
Because love has no limits-it will only grow.
God has no limits, and He is love.
Believe in God, and that through Him and His love you will bring forth joy. God's love will sustain us and increase in our lives. It is a love you can rely on and trust-an eternal one.
